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PODCAST

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast

Jai The Gentleman

Dear Black Gay Men Weekly is your weekly dopeness reminder and your favorite content creator’s favorite content. dearblackgaymen.substack.com

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

78:12

Kid Fury's Return, Blind Dating, and the "I Love You"...

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/10/22

From Depression to Desire: Kid Fury is Back and We’re Talking Dating, Catcalls, and Black Male BeautyAre You Stuck in a Sad Boy Shell? Kid Fury and the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast Host Say Get Outside!The latest episode of the Dear Black Gay Men podcast, hosted by Jai the Gentleman, is a must-listen for Black queer men navigating life, dating, and mental health. This week, Jai the Gentleman is reacting to the highly anticipated return of internet icon, Kid Fury, whose first upload in a decade, “One

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83:12

Decoding “Daddy”: Beyond the Bedroom in Black Gay...

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/10/15

Join JAI The Gentleman of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast as he breaks down an exclusive, off-air conversation from the “Private Party” episode and dives into the ambiguity of this cultural term.In this episode, we tackle the big questions:* Does “daddy” have a meaning outside of sex in Black gay culture?* Does the term lose its meaning when we use it too often?* Is it simply a top with a big dick, or does it come with a level of real-life responsibility?JAI even shares an exclusive update about his

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66:41

I Obsessed Over Getting Men To Commit in...

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/09/30

I interviewed 20 eligible single men to find out the real reasons they don’t commit. This episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast unpacks the surprisingly consistent dating horror stories and boils them down to three basic things every man needs to commit to a relationship.In this video, you’ll learn:* 🔑 The number one reason men don’t commit: they don’t know what they want, or can’t concretely say why.* 🗣️ The three simple considerations men make when deciding to take dating to the next level:

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83:18

I Obsessed Over Being a Better Top (here's what I...

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/09/25

I talked 20 bottoms to bust myths tops have about good sex. Twenty conversations narrowed down to just 4 things that bottoms say tops can do to have immediately better sexWhether you’re dating someone new, in a long term relationship already, or just hooking up while you’re single, sex is an inevitable part of your life. We all want it and we all want ours to be the best.My whole job on this channel is to help Black gay men remember how dope it is to be us and to love us. Sometimes that

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89:38

Black Men Don't Lynch Ourselves

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/09/18

A Black man was lynched in America in 2025.Let me state, unequivocally, that this episode or us reacting to this story is not intended to position any person in this story as a member of the LGBTQIA+ community.But Demontre Reed was a Black man and to that end, he could have been me, or any of our listeners, or our brother, or our cousin, or our son. Regardless of his sexuality or ours, we, as Black men have a responsibility to this man’s life.So Tonight, I’m opening the conversation up from

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83:29

How To Set HEALTHY Dating Boundaries

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/09/17

Boundaries are simply what I say hell yea to.A good man will function well within your tolerable region without issue. And when he bumps up against your boundary, he’ll identify it, acknowledge, make good on the violation, and move on with a clearer understanding.But all of that is built on being clear about boundaries and that clarity, for most of us, comes long before we start dating anyone in particular.So tonight, we’re reacting to one tiktoker who breaks down boundaries, rules, and expectations

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75:38

Why Is Dating Black Men So Hard?

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/09/16

My last relationship ended three times.The first time was because I was insecure. The second time was because he was impatient. The third time was because I never invested myself back into the relationship after the first two attempts.It takes a lot to see the dating process through to it’s hopeful end. Self-awareness is probably at the top of the list.So tonight, I’m asking the DBGM family to pull on our self-awareness. Each of us has to ask ourselves, “are we the drama?”Is dating actually hard, or

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64:59

Red Flags You Should Never Ignore

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/09/12

I believe that when we’re dating in our 30s, because we have something to lose, we try to safeguard our hearts and our lives from men that don’t mean for our good.That’s why red flags have become so important. We’ve seen our parent’s red flags when we were little. We’ve overlooked obvious red flags in our 20s. We’ve talked to our friends about their boyfriends red flags in our 30s.Everything in us is trying to avoid red flags and the headaches that come with them.So tonight, I’m talking red flags

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92:23

Why Gay Men Stay Single

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/09/11

Earlier this year, I dated someone for 6 months.I told my best friend about him after 3 months. He’d met my siblings after 5. On the face, it looked like things were progressing.The quiet truth is that he had dumped twice and I was too insecure to leave it alone when everyone around me told him he wasn’t the one.What I know about myself and so many others is that we, Black gay men, want to be in love. We want our person, but so many of us eligible bachelors are still in the dating pool.So tonight, I

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87:04

What Makes a MAN Versatile?

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/09/09

While I haven’t bottomed in a long time, most of my exes have been versatile.The irony, though, is that most of the problems and successes we faced in relationships stemmed from everything aside from what happens in the bedroom.Being verse, just like being top or bottom, can be limited to just dicks and asses, but I’ve found that for most of us, sexual position has some spill over into emotions, how we express our queerness, and how we’d like to be received by our partners.So tonight, let’s assume

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82:02

Are The Real Tops Gone?

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/09/05

I am what the gworls would call a “soft top”.I like to do all the traditionally masculine things, but I also am fully a butch queen. I haven’t been fucked in years and don’t have a whole lot of interest in being fucked, but I would for the right person as long as they know how to handle my delicate flower.Fun Fact: someone once called it a slut with my dick but a prude with my hole.1. The Top Drought (00:00:00)2. Church Announcements: The Blog and a Hookup Story (00:01:52)3. Understanding Bottom’s

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60:01

Why Do We Sexualize EVERYTHING?

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/08/29

I like being naked. I like being naked with other men. And I like being naked when sex has nothing to do with it…but it can.I call that being a nudist, but sometimes terms like kink, or nudist, or voyeur don’t resonate with Black men. But can they? Or should they?So tonight, I’m joined by the promoter behind the biggest wave of nudist club nights for cis men by a Black promoter. I’ve attended his events and found a whole new acceptance of who I am and the body I live in.Connect with MrSinsored:

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75:32

Where Do Trans Men Fit in Gay Pride?

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/08/27

When I walk into any pride celebration, there are a couple things that connect me and most of the men present. Number 1: we’re all men and Number 2: we’re attracted to men. But what happens when only one of those apply to all of us and how do we create pride celebrations that affirm all of our experiences.So tonight I’m joined by A’Jay Love. He’s a trans masc creator who gained prominence when he was highlighted on Truly’s “My Extraordinary Family” where he shared his parenting journey as a man of

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15:25

I Interviewed 50 Couples. Here's What No One Tells Us...

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/07/30

These couples uncover the secrets to successfully navigating the dating pool as I abruptly find myself back in it.* 00:00:00 - Introduction: Three Rules for Finding a Man* 00:01:11 - Applying the Lessons & Welcome* 00:02:02 - Personal Update: Dealing with a Breakup* 00:04:50 - The Danger of Denying Emotions After a Breakup* 00:09:25 - Finding a Good Man: Setting Intention* 00:11:02 - Different Love Stories & Knowing What You Want* 00:12:30 - Overcoming Baggage and Seeing with Clear Eyes* 00:14:11 -

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18:51

Why Good Men Love Open Relationships (while 70% of...

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/07/02

My inadequacies around relationship stemmed from times when my feelings were disregarded. I learned, having been on the receiving end of emotional trauma, that there are three basic agreements at work in any relationship. Nailing these will help quell the inadequacies and insecurities so many of us experience in our partners, and make way for clear agreements that both (or all) involved can be comfortable with.Chapters: Three Basic Agreements in a Healthy Relationship (00:00:00)Agreement with Self:

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16:22

I Came Out...to My P*nis

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/06/11

This week Jai The Gentleman discusses:How "coming out" goes way further than just telling people you're gay. It's an everyday process that starts with yourself.NEW CONTENT, every day on YT : youtube.com/@dearblackgaymenSubscribe to second channel: youtube.com/@jaithegentlemanShop Brand New Merch: https://dearblackgaymen.shopListen on Spotify: https://spoti.fi/3CvMjThListen on Apple Podcasts: https://apple.co/3pKIK47ChaptersIntroduction: Defining "Coming Out" (00:00:00)Introduction & Announcements

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15:08

I Found My Boyfriend...Then My Life Fell Apart

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/05/28

This week Jai The Gentleman discusses the last relationship he was in and how Black queer culture tried to destroy it. And how you can safeguard your relationship from the triggers that come from the gworls.00:00 Introduction to Black Gay Culture and Relationships 01:04 Welcome to Dear Black Gay Men Podcast 01:47 Personal Dating Experiences and Vulnerability 03:11 Church Announcements and Upcoming Events 05:15 Lessons Learned from Past Relationships 07:43 The Importance of Trust in Relationships

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14:30

3 Signs Your Black Gay Romance is the Real Deal

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/05/07

Read “I made 6 guys cum at the park” https://bit.ly/4jFmRx3Chapters00:00 The Importance of Sex in Relationships 00:57 Introduction to the Podcast 01:56 Church Announcements 04:21 Signs of a Healthy Relationship 08:35 The Complexity of Relationships 13:24 Conclusion and Final Thoughts➡️ Shop DBGM Merch: https://www.dearblackgaymen.shop ➡️ Become an Insider: https://youtube.com/@dearblackgaymen/join➡️ Join the newsletter: http://dearblackgaymen.substack.com📲 Subscribe to Dear Black Gay Men

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20:23

I was nude in the club...

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/04/23

A trip to Atlanta's nude club night, "Reveal," taught me that I'm probably better off single in this season of life.Read "I Made 6 Guys Cum At The Park" https://bit.ly/4jFmRx3--Chapters00:00 Introduction to Single Life Levels 00:09 Coincidentally Single 00:39 Intentionally Single 00:56 Temporarily Single 01:28 Podcast Introduction 02:09 Church Announcements 05:12 Breakup Reflections 07:53 Lessons from Joe 15:31 Embracing Single Life 19:12 Conclusion and Final Thoughts--➡️ Connect with Jai The

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24:56

The Break-up Is Over...Now What?

Dear Black Gay Men Podcast ·

2025/04/09

00:00 Introduction: Post-Breakup Reflections01:31 New Features: Substack and Live Shows04:10 Church Announcements: Updates and Membership04:42 Personal Story: Lessons from a Breakup07:51 Dating Insights: Commitment and Communication17:44 Final Thoughts: The Importance of Perseverance23:53 Closing Remarks: Stay Connected Get full access to Dear Black Gay Men’s Substack at dearblackgaymen.substack.com/subscribe

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132 results

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