PODCAST

Ugly People

Michael Huebner, Kavon Rassi, Riley Fall

one of the podcasts ever made

comedy stand-up

All Episodes

83:46

Ep. 49: super enlightened centrists

Ugly People ·

2024/08/09

in which we delve back into politics for better or for worse. we are in the middle and have NO BIASES, bet***this was recorded like 3 days before the assas*nat*on attempt and probably isn't relevant at all to the current race but we argue alot, you've been warned***IG: @kavonrassi @rileyfallcomedy @uglypeoplepodcasttwitch.tv/huebz

51:03

Ep. 48: Alex Jones Is Bill Hicks

Ugly People ·

2024/08/02

the podcast returns after a 2 week depression fueled layoff. Riley defends Bill Hicks from me and Kavon & we discuss conspiracy theories. we rank the strongest Asians. we talk about being low carb hangry. we talk about old people comics who should quit. we rank Scottish accents vs Welsh. we are so backIG: @kavonrassi @rileyfallcomedy @uglypeoplepodcasttwitch.tv/huebz

102:54

Ep. 47: Don't Hype Him Up (ft. Chris D'Aiello)

Ugly People ·

2024/07/05

in which Kavon and Riley are replaced by comedian Chris D'Aiello, who quickly usurps and becomes the new host of Ugly People. it's better this way, trust. we do bits and Chris gives us a CutCo pitch. we talk fat vegetarians and dorito heads. we decide that roast battles would be better if comics actually fought each other. i tell the story about the time i got my ass beat by a taekwondo black belt. we discuss horrifying TikTok challenges and going to hardcore shows. somos extremos. this was

58:17

Ep. 46: Wok-N-Tok

Ugly People ·

2024/06/28

in which we learn about r*tard checking, save-scumming, and pluggers. we get sad talking about our horses in Red Dead Redemption 2. Riley tries to convince us that he isn't involved in a pyramid scheme and we share our experiences with scammers. we think about what ChatGPT's algorithm would be like if it was only fed r*tarded answers. we talk the controversy surrounding Joey Chesnut switching to vegan dogs. shoutout to Costco Ho and hip-hop Asians in generalIG: @kavonrassi @rileyfallcomedy

52:32

Ep. 45: Mexico Rogan

Ugly People ·

2024/06/21

in which we discuss the difference between chest hair and ball hair, Asian ear cleaning techniques and the classic video of Charlie Z getting beat up by Deontay Wilder (RIP Wilder btw). We talk UFC announcers and forget Hispanic Joe Rogan's name. We shoutout Casey Rocket despite having no connection to him. Kavon is late so we call our entire group chat on IG to bother him. We talk gay MMA fighters. We get to the bottom of Aljamain Sterling hate. Kavon introduces Riley to the Super-Fi. We

105:01

Ep. 44: You Got Pallet Hands

Ugly People ·

2024/06/14

in which we delve deep into politics against our better judgement. we're a debate podcast now folks. we recount the entirety of 2020 that started with Australia burning then Kobe dying which led to the pandemic (it's all connected). we wonder if Trump is gonna "hold the keys" in prison. we talk Ukraine and the middle east from the perspective or morons. we talk about dry-jerking to build resistance. we disagree about Jimmy Dore being a grifter. we explain to Kavon why you NEVER ask other

73:52

Ep. 43: Deep State Dawgs

Ugly People ·

2024/06/09

in which Riley tells us about his fantasy football picks coming through hard, how both Trump and Biden both having dementia is gonna dope for the debates and propose that they should play basketball instead. We come out as a Pro-Wikipedia podcast but we don't believe those messages asking for money at the top of each article. We lament being short guys (kings). We broke the No-Politics rule, alot. Lots of high school stories: huebz recounts trash canning a kid twice with James the Romanian

63:14

Ep. 42: Great Value Men

Ugly People ·

2024/05/31

in which we think about what a woke incel would look like, consider converting all of our assets to gold, and officially declare ourselves as HIGH VALUE MEN and part of the Man-O-Sphere. we discuss the horrific Diddy-Cassie video. we talk the old days of pirating movies & black people watching Harry Potter. Kavon recounts a trip to Vegas where he hooked up with an old lady on *legal* mushroom chocolate. Kavon leaves at some point so huebz and Riley glaze Bret Ernst and do bad Italian

47:10

Ep. 41: Burka King

Ugly People ·

2024/05/24

we talk about Zoe the Dog's near death experience, we share our experiences being caregivers and pooping on boobs being a billionaire activity. we cover middle east news including the ICC declaring Netanyahu a war criminal and the death of Iran's god-king emperor. Kavon and Riley challenge each other to a basketball 1 on 1 because we are sports guys. we tell Tom Goss stories and declare him a Geodude. we compare Jack from the Box vs The Burger KING. we decide that hot male doctors are the

75:24

Ep. 40: Show Me Da Buffet

Ugly People ·

2024/05/17

in which we talk about diddler comedians, editing mishaps and Beetlejuice (the man not the movie). We gush over John Pinette. huebz and Riley hold it down when Kavon leaves early because of Chris D'elia. We mix up Scary Movie and How High? and decide TJ Miller is just an evil Duncan Trussell. We take blinkers. We shout out our Indian fanbase and do bad accents. We try and bring back the word smite. We talk local geography and declare Elon Musk the messiah. huebz teaches Riley what a coomer

43:16

Ep. 39: "No Russian" But It's Played By Pikachu

Ugly People ·

2024/05/10

*i accidentally wiped the SD card with the audio, ignore the ambient dog noises* Riley is out of town so the boys hold it down in the dark. Topics include: Kendrick vs. Drake, Nintendo killing GMod, copyright policy, (sensei) Steven Seagal, Kavon learning hapkido from Master Kim, TFATK hate, The Ultimate Fighter Season 10 (s/o Titties). Kavon reveals our new mascot, a fully bearded James Harden bobble headIG: @kavonrassi @rileyfallcomedy @uglypeoplepodcasttwitch.tv/huebz

61:34

Ep. 38: F**k Yo Couch

Ugly People ·

2024/05/03

in which we cement ourselves as the fattest podcast on earth by literally breaking our couch on air. topics include: Riley's past as an aspiring magician, John Mulaney, the fall of Haiti and the Sudanese civil war. we discuss Wyclef Jean possibly being a CIA asset and realize that he wasn't actually in the Black Eyed Peas. we talk about prison power dynamics and declare that the only winners in prison are the guards. skip the 15 minutes where we try and put the couch back together, which is

51:29

Ep. 37: From the Base

Ugly People ·

2024/04/26

in which we talk about Neal Brennan's specials, mix up airplane movies and (newly married 18 year old) Riley introduces us to Saucy Santana. we try and figure out proper jelqing technique. we talk buff indian guys and figure out that we all suck at accents. we are once again wrong about geography. Blood Diamond gets brought up again somehow. Kavon explains what a Mary Sue is and talks about making an enemy at Planet Fitness. we practice our ad read skills, sponsor us please Bad DragonIG:

40:35

Ep. 36: Red Pill-ow Talk

Ugly People ·

2024/04/19

in which we talk about Miyazaki movies being too sad, Kavon being a sports guy now, starchy socks, messing up people's Netflix algo's, stealing fight PPV streams, debate Key & Peele vs Chapelle for the best black sketch show, and consider becoming Red Pill griftersIG: @kavonrassi @rileyfallcomedy @uglypeoplepodcasttwitch.tv/huebz

64:16

Ep. 35: Omegle Mind

Ugly People ·

2024/04/12

in which we mispronounce James Harden's name, debate the validity of Diddy-Meek Mill audio, our experiences talking to naked people on Omegle & Kavon's recent training in his quest to jump higher. we discuss the 21 Savage is Tupac theory and decide who the winner of the J. Cole/Kendrick/Drake beef is. ***this was recorded 2 days before OJ died*** s/o to our buddy Chris and his ol' big d*ck. RIP Rec Room (2017-2024)IG: @kavonrassi @rileyfallcomedy @uglypeoplepodcasttwitch.tv/huebz

55:09

Ep. 34: Blinker Town

Ugly People ·

2024/03/29

in which we hit the pen(s) too hard and end up in Blinkerville, USA. topics include chimp combat tactics (they fight dirty), Gen Z being hungry for blood, dogs getting the big stretch, and celebrity sex tapes. we confuse LeVar Burton with Verne Troyer and somehow fail to remember his biggest credit (he was the Reading Rainbow guy). Paulo Costa is a dawg and a future bond villain. i'm extra fat in this episodeIG: @kavonrassi @rileyfallcomedy @uglypeoplepodcasttwitch.tv/huebz

64:11

Ep. 33: Chewin' Dudes

Ugly People ·

2024/03/22

in which we confuse Al Bundy and Ted Bundy and declare that Rosa Parks could get it. we don't know what Dixie means but its probably racist. we talk about TikTok'ers invading Walmart and how strong our tummies are. we learn to pregame with Pepto Bismol. we advocate for AI drivers but not AI cops. we argue that robots are inherently racist because they can't recognize darker skin tones. we reminisce about being attacked by animals and other traumatic childhood experiences. we call out comedy

82:44

Ep. 32: Take My Wood Bro

Ugly People ·

2024/03/17

in which we talk about height insecurity, the unskilled labor market, right-wing accordion players and wheelchair comics. we go down the black 2A rabbit hole. we show why the Midwest is mid at best. Kavon finds out what a defensive back does. we realize that we are too old for kiwi farms and reminisce about the old internet. kenny does kettlebell hammer swings offscreen for us. superboy Riley sits this one out as he had to work. S/O misters mutahar & metokur. rogan boards 4 lyfeIG:

56:45

Ep. 31: Clippers Season Tix

Ugly People ·

2024/03/08

in which we realize that banks are evil. we discuss gas station hot pockets, the death of eSports, and why youtuber fights suck. we talk Sean Strickland beating the sh*t out of Sneako and just generally being a terrifying person. we try to predict a new meme stock. we learn that Riley doesn't know who Hasan Piker is and his life is better for it*now with re-uploaded audio because Kavon's mic was muted. we run a tight ship here folks*IG: @kavonrassi @rileyfallcomedy

37:49

Ep. 30: Goochie Goochie Goo

Ugly People ·

2024/03/01

in which we talk Swifties, mass shootings and hockey fights. We wonder why our algorithms are the way that they are. Kavon considers cashing in his IRA to buy Clippers season tickets and talks about yelling at an underling at work. Riley talks his new job at Panda Express and we defend the Orange Chicken. We argue that California should secede and start rolling on small countries because we're the best. Kavon explains how to fart a baby (sus). Gang GangIG: @kavonrassi @rileyfallcomedy

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