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PODCAST

Paleo Bites

Welcome to Paleo Bites, the weekly podcast hosted by Matthew Donald where we make dumb jokes, reference pop culture, derail like crazy, and oh yeah, discuss and rate dinosaurs and other prehistoric animals. Each episode Matthew and a rotating set of guest co-hosts talk about a different genus of primeval critter, explain basic stats, exchange plenty of banter, barely fact-check, and at the end, rate the creature one out of 65 million for any reason, including but not limited to sexiness, mana, and

comedy natural sciences

All Episodes

19:06

Purgatorius, of Purgatory Hill

Paleo Bites ·

2025/10/31

(image source: https://www.nationalgeographic.com/science/article/did-ancient-primates-walk-alongside-dinosaurs-new-evidence-backs-up-theory) Happy Paleo Bites-oween, where we will host Halloween themed episodes all week, every day! On this fourth day of Paleo Bites-oween, this one on actual Halloween (but don’t worry, the celebration of Paleo Bites-oween will last the whole week still) host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Purgatorius, a tiny squirrel-like mammal that seems

en

16:38

Zuul, the Destroyer of Shins Again

Paleo Bites ·

2025/10/30

(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Zuul-picture) Happy Paleo Bites-oween, where we will host Halloween themed episodes all week, every day! On this third day of Paleo Bites-oween, host Matthew Donald unearths an older Halloween episode from years back to rerelease in all of its glory. Kind of like a fossil. Or a mummy. From the Late Cretaceous, this 20-foot ankylosaur had a really big tail club and a really funny name, based off the demon dog from Ghostbusters. And just like Ghostbusters,

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23:06

Vampyronassa, the Vampiric Fish Trap

Paleo Bites ·

2025/10/29

(image source: https://prehistoric-wiki.fandom.com/wiki/Vampyronassa) Happy Paleo Bites-oween, where we will host Halloween themed episodes all week, every day! On this second day of Paleo Bites-oween, host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lexi Ryan discuss Vampyronassa, a fricking vampire squid… it’s not as cool as it sounds. From the Late Jurassic, this 4-inch vampyromorph cephalopod is basically the same as the one vampire squid species around today, except it lacks retractile filaments. Whatever

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19:18

Desmodus draculae, the Giant Dracula Bat

Paleo Bites ·

2025/10/28

(image source: https://www.sportskeeda.com/esports/how-find-desmodus-ark-survival-evolved-fjordur) Happy Paleo Bites-oween, where we will host Halloween themed episodes all week, every day! On this first day of Paleo Bites-oween, host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Desmodus draculae, the biggest vampire bat ever known and thus a perfect way to start off the spooky season. Except it’s not that spooky. Or that big. It’s actually kind of cute. Look at it, happily licking up that

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7:32

Zalmoxes, of the Dacian Deity

Paleo Bites ·

2025/10/21

(image source: https://images.dinosaurpictures.org/Zalmoxes_FI_38b7.jpg) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host… well, there was a guy there, my best friend also named Matt, but he’s already served his time doing Paleo Bites back in the day so he was silent here, discuss Zalmoxes, a teeny iguanodontid that lived on the Romanian islands back in the day and thus underwent island dwarfism. That’s cool. Almost as cool as doing this impromptu episode in the middle of a queue at Universal Studios’ Jurassic

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29:54

Thanatosdrakon, the Dragon of Death

Paleo Bites ·

2025/10/14

(image source: https://lorosyguacamayos.com.ar/ave-voladora-mas-grande-de-la-historia-dinosaurio/) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-hosts Jaymes Buckman (and their friend Jamie) discuss Thanatosdrakon, a huge pterosaur with a fricking awesome name. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say this thing was described in the 90s or early 2000s when everything was super-edgy. From the Late Cretaceous, this 30-foot-wingspan azhdarchid flew and stalked across prehistoric South America like the dragon of death

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17:40

Drinker, of Edward Drinker Cope

Paleo Bites ·

2025/10/07

(image source: https://images.dinosaurpictures.org/Drinker/Drinker_latest_acb4.jpg) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Cygnus D. Stonewell (the D stands for Dinosaur) discuss Drinker, a dinosaur that’s actually now called Nanosaurus and was absorbed into that genus alongside Othnielosaurus and Laosaurus but hey, “Drinker” will get more clicks so here it is! We live in a capitalistic tar pit that we can never escape, folks. From the Late Jurassic, this 9-foot neornithischian had an interesting

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17:22

Ikrandraco, the Dragon of the Avatar Banshee

Paleo Bites ·

2025/09/30

(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Ikrandraco-pictures) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Ikrandraco, a big flying reptile named after a creature from the highest grossing movie series of all time. “No cultural footprint” my ass! From the Early Cretaceous, this 5-foot-wingspan pterosaur flapped around in its homeland in the two countries we’ve found it in, China and England. You know, those basically nextdoor neighbors. Then again, maybe they took a space bridge to

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26:06

Anurognathus, the Frog Jaw

Paleo Bites ·

2025/09/23

(image source: https://jurassic-world-san-diego.fandom.com/wiki/Anurognathus) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Anurognathus, a freaky looking bat-frog thing that’s actually a pterosaur and thus closely related to birds and crocodiles. Nature’s weird, I gotta say. From the Late Jurassic, this 12-inch anurognathid pterosaur ate bugs and flapped its little wings and probably got terrified of moths. That’s just speculation, but it makes sense, right? I’m terrified of moths. I’m

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25:09

Corythosaurus, the Helmeted Lizard

Paleo Bites ·

2025/09/16

(image source: https://jurassicpark.fandom.com/wiki/Corythosaurus/JW:_E) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lawrence Mack discuss Corythosaurus, a duckbilled dinosaur with a helmet on its head… except not so much a helmet, as I doubt it would help much against collisions with street pavement or Ankylosaurus clubs. But hey, maybe it would. I’d welcome being surprised. From the Late Cretaceous, this 30-foot lambeosaurine hadrosaurid is one of the few animals we know how it sounded, as we’ve

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22:09

Argentinosaurus, the Argentine Lizard

Paleo Bites ·

2025/09/09

(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Argentinosaurus-pictures) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Argentinosaurus, a really, really, REALLY big longneck. Like, REALLY big. Oh, and it’s also from Argentina. From the Late Cretaceous, this 100-foot titanosaurid was… goddang, it was SO big! Like seriously, look at it! LOOK AT IT! I am bereft of joke-making capability seeing this thing! At least, even more bereft than I normally am. Want to further support the show

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17:19

Rhamphorhynchus, the Beak Snout

Paleo Bites ·

2025/09/02

(image source: https://fossil.fandom.com/wiki/Rhamphorhynchus) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Rhamphorhynchus, a sea pterosaur with a lot of pointy teeth and even more unnecessary H’s in its name. No word should have that many ‘H’ letters in it, and if you disagree, shhhh! From the Late Jurassic, this six-foot wingspan pterosaur had a big pointy fin at the end of its tail that inspired a lot of dragon art, which is pretty cool. Not as cool as if this thing somehow actually

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14:44

Vaderlimulus, the Horseshoe Crab of Darth Vader

Paleo Bites ·

2025/08/26

(image source: https://www.deviantart.com/ntvtiko/art/Vaderlimulus-tricki-754817629) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Vaderlimulus, a horseshoe crab that looked like Darth Vader, or at least like the top of Darth Vader’s helmet. The hat part of the helmet, you know? I bet this gives great helmet. From the Early Triassic, this 4-inch xiphosuran arthropod was your father… at least if you were the little spawn of one of these things. If not, and you’re just a lousy human, this

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20:08

Kosmoceratops, the Ornate Horned Face

Paleo Bites ·

2025/08/19

(image source: https://eartharchives.org/articles/kosmoceratops-was-the-frilliest-of-all-the-ceratopsians/) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lawrence Mack discuss Kosmoceratops, a very horny dinosaur in that it had the most horns of any horned dinosaurs. Although maybe it was also horny in the other sense. What it did in its time is none of my business. From the Late Cretaceous, this 16-foot centrosaurine ceratopsian wasn’t space-themed like its name suggested, which is a shame, as I love the

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21:56

Shunosaurus, the Lizard of the Sichuan Province

Paleo Bites ·

2025/08/12

(image source: https://jurassicpark.fandom.com/wiki/Shunosaurus/JW:_TG?file=Shunosaurus.png) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Shunosaurus, a small longneck dinosaur that’s not very notable except it has a club at the end of its tail. That’s not that notable either, Shunny-boy. I have a club too! A “Cool Dino Fan” club, currently the only members being me and my mom. From the Mid to Late Jurassic, this 35-foot eusauropod sauntered around its marshy Jurassic scrubland while

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25:58

Hatzegopteryx, the Wing of Hateg Basin

Paleo Bites ·

2025/08/05

(image source: https://image.pbs.org/video-assets/5kg0O0I-asset-mezzanine-16x9-RIS0K1C.png) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Hatzegopteryx, the last shadow the poor dwarf dino islanders of the Hateg basin ever saw. Oh, watch out, Zalmoxes! You’re gonna get et by a jet. From the Late Cretaceous, this 36-foot wingspan azhdarchid pterosaur was basically a giraffe with wings. And a big beak poke of death. And was carnivorous. And could fly. So not really a giraffe. But it looked

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17:56

"Suciasaurus rex," the State Dinosaur of Washington

Paleo Bites ·

2025/07/29

(image source: https://www.heraldnet.com/northwest/suciasaurus-rex-named-washington-states-official-dinosaur/) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Jason Zolle discuss “Suciasaurus rex,” an informally named fossil that’s probably Daspletosaurus or something but that’s not the state dinosaur of Washington, is it? Listen to our episode on that particular genus. Oh wait, we haven’t actually done an episode on Daspletosaurus yet. Someday, though. From the Late Cretaceous, this possible 30-foot

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15:16

Hoplitosaurus, the Hoplite Lizard

Paleo Bites ·

2025/07/22

(original image source: https://images.dinosaurpictures.org/sauropelta_5c34.jpg)Happy 300 episodes! Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Leonychus the Hoplitosaurus, King of the Lakota Formation, discuss (by performing an overly dramatic farcical audiodrama) Hoplitosaurus, a heavily defended creature that fought the encroaching Acrocanthosaurus armies... except that dinosaur was from a different formation and there's no evidence these two species met. But that's why they're encroaching in this

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20:10

Rhizodus, the Rooted Tooth

Paleo Bites ·

2025/07/15

(image source: https://dinopedia.fandom.com/wiki/Rhizodus) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lawrence Mack discuss Rhizodus, the largest ever freshwater fish that had so much rizz it lived for 30 million whole years. Rhizodus-dizz, thanks for all the rizz! From the Early Carboniferous, this 20-foot sarcopterygian was actually more closely related to us humans than other fish, although it wasn’t necessarily a direct ancestor, just related. I will personally leave no descendants, so the birthing

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20:20

Shantungosaurus, the Lizard of the Shandong Province

Paleo Bites ·

2025/07/08

(image source: https://makerworld.com/en/models/767570-shantungosaurus) Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Shantungosaurus, a big big BIG duckbilled dinosaur, and in fact the biggest non-sauropod dinosaur ever! Then again, I’m the biggest guy named Matthew who’s written a book called Megazoic. Probably, anyways. From the Late Cretaceous, this 56-foot saurolophine hadrosaurid dealt with its own Chinese version of T. rex called Zhuchengtyrannus, making it a prequel of sorts to

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